Closer to the edge

Weather forecast: 11ºCMax, 0ºC Min, no wind, no clouds


There are bad days where anything works... The black night´s darkness is on my back and... me, I am lonely again, lonely like the prey in front the predator. Well, at this moment, I consider myself like a dead, dead in but alive out.

I guess it is me the problem, I must accept my role in life, I must learn to accept the things. I... don´t... know.

Today, I am tired, lonely, anything works,  in my head, of course.

However, it is the remember of one frozen kiss in the past, a missed word in the time et thousands of broken promises beneath the Hell´s cold.

Finally, life is sum with 2 words: victory and defeat. Someone is victorious and another one, well, you know what they are. Me, I do think the second team belongs to me. No by own initiative. Not at all. I guess that it is a kind of "natural selection".

If I could write again, if I could say her loving you, if I had a kiss from her, if I had a job after so many years of formation,  if I wasn´t lonely...

 Blah, blah, that makes no sense.  You punish yourself, you hide yourself, you close your mouth. Finally you believe in. Look at your shoulders, we are closer to last eve of this year, everybody is happy. And you, you. You are like always! You say something with no sense,  you think about stupid things. You won´t never change! Listen to this! You breath! You keep on alive! So, fight against your situation, accept the challenge. Loneliness is just a moment, a week and quick moment which dies like the company you missed to. You know that, you know life is like a way on grounds, on the forest, on mountains.  Sometimes, you will be on the beach. Another time, you will be in a way covered by sharp rocks and you will be barefoot. And another time, you couldn´t choose a way between 2 routes. Listen to this asshole, life is just one person, one person who lives in yourself. Yes, you don´t believe me but it is like this way. Life isn´t a dream, life is yourself, your ideas, your thoughts, your feelings. Do you know the most people is more dead or certainly dead? Yes, because they can´t think, they can´t have feelings. Oh my god! Breath, breath, because you are alive and me... Me, I am not exist, can you see? I am not exist but I am telling you exist like an alive being. Don´t look at me like that! I can see your eyes. I know everything is very different, that it isn´t easy for yourself,  without her, with anybody, without future.  Haven´t you thought that it is just a day where anything works? Tomorrow, next day or next years, you will be free, you could see the past and you could say that you had been loved her (or maybe that you love her yet), that you had been loved her but you didn´t know how to maintain and, by consequence, you will be learned what you haven´t never do. Go out now. I am waiting for you and I am longing for sleep but you don´t want to. It doesn´t matter a year with anyone. It doesn´t matter! It doesn´t matter you don´t consider special each day. A day, a day you will be heard me and I speak seriously. Baf, I am going to sleep.

28th day in Spain, What is it?

Weather forecast: 9ºC Max, 2ºC Min, no wind, sunny without clouds


Hi to everybody! Nice to write again a few words on this blog.

First, I would like to say you Happy Christmas and have a nice eve on 31th December. It is true that it sounds odd the way I say it.

Well, today I would write about a Spanish Tradition. However, it isn´t a holiday. 28th December  is the day of "El día de los Santos Inocentes". A day where anybody can make jokes with the people. In a certain way is very similar to the Fool´s day on 1st April in UK.

Wow, It is curious because the British use the word "fool" and the Spaniards "innocent".

Furthermore, in that day there is an specific tradition in a little village of Valencia´s Region, I guess. In that village (Ibis), some strange guys called "els farinats" give out the power from politics and they can govern until the Dawn. So, they made non-sense laws, for example, it is forbidden to stay on the street, to have shops opened or closed and so on. However, everybody that doesn´t follow their rules will be punished to have on their body a mixture made of flour and eggs.
Moreover, there is a weird battle where weapons are flour, eggs and fireworks.

I don´t know very well because, as you imagine, Spain has a lot of traditions according to which Region.

Have a good time!    

P.S.: picture from http://www.gentedigital.es/fotografias/galeria/372/fiesta-de-els-enfarinats-en-el-municipio-alicantino-de-ibi/

22th December: The Lottery Day (Spanish traditions)

Weather forecast: : 13ºC Max, 0º Min, no wind and no clouds

Good night to all! Yeah, I am here again. Today because I want to speak you about today. Uh, well, about yesterday because It is 00.24 am in these moments.

So, today (yesterday) had been one of the most days throughout a year: The Lottery day or the "El Gordo " (The fat man) Day!

In Spain, during all the year, people are buying lottery´s papers by that day. It is an usual present to their work mates, their friends, their families. Whoever.

Nearly the majority is waiting for that day with the dream of being rich, of change their luck, in order to stop and change their current situation. Otherwise, you could find people waiting in 4 hours queues at Madrid´s streets, until one day ago. People is crazy!!!

Well, and what is people doing on such day? It is very simple. Everybody is watching TV or listening to the radio to double-check if they had had any luck.

Furthermore, the numbers are sang by children with no parents and there is a lot of people who wants to watch in live. Some people goes with odd customs and, as a result, many spectators watch TV for that reason.

Personally, I don´t join because I find that like a way to lose money because it is very difficult to have luck and I think it is better to spend money in other things, and with more senses at this crisis time. Therefore, today I switch off TV and radio, I don´t listen the radio because , as you guess, they are speaking all the day about. It is frustrating.

So, today (yesterday) I had left my English study to visit one person, one important and especial person to me, nearly an angel. I could see that favorite landscape based on Madrid´s Region´s mountains, with their green color and with their smile... And finally, I am here dreaming of but it has no sense to dream because I know the true reality and, life keep on being life, with huge defeats and with little victories.

Well, I´m going to leave you because I have finished listening a strange bird song from New Zealand, the Kokako!!! He gives me relax.  Have a good day!

North Korea, another world

Weather forecast: 11ºC Max, 4ºC Min, no wind, no clouds

Hi to everybody! We are more and more closer to Christmas time. While a lot of people are buying the last presents, the US, Japan and South Korea´s citizens are worried about the evolution of North Korea after Kim Jong II died in this week. But, is it true a possible nuclear war?

Well, I do recognize it isn´t a simple question because nearly nobody knows about North Korea. Uh, okay, we know they are a nuclear power in the world and they are "war" lovers because of the most militarized society in the world. We don´t know any else.

In this summer, I have the amazing opportunity to being in a cycle of conferences about Asia and their past, present and future reality. Furthermore, I had the pleasure of being present at the speech of one of the few experts about North Korea. He has got the chance of working like a teacher in a North Korea university and he has also a medal from North Korea régime. He is a curious man, that is true.

So, it is possible that someone know better what I am going to say but I believe I can open people´s eyes to know better the reality of this country.

First, in order to understand the North Korean we must note that they haven´t a political state. So, it changes any analysis we could make. It is more like a religion. Yeah, I am speaking seriously, Kim Jong II was a God for them. So, it is normal you find a picture of each room in any home. They believe in the president like a divinity.

Therefore, we can guess stronger opposition against all that tries to change their ideas because someone isn´t against a dictator, s/he is against their God. In addition, we can see their incredible faith because 3,000,000 of people are died because of the lack of food, for instance, but they keep on believing. So, we can understand the idea about they live in a deep religion. I guess you have seen how people is crying at TV. However, they are bad consequences because the North Korean don´t make anything in their own, they need someone tells them what they must do in each moment.

Second, nearly 60% of population have nutritional problems, maybe because they can´t produce enough food or whatever.

Third, they love communism as you will know. For this reason, their only ally is China.

Fourth, they have one of the hugest armies in the world and, of course, they have the atomic bomb. Nevertheless, according to recent NATO´s reports they have an old army and, moreover, they no have money or goods to maintain their vehicles. So, if there is a war between North Korea and South Korea, South Korea could win without any problem. Okay, the big risk is the atomic just in case.

To sum up, I would like to note that a war with such country is easier than journal thought against an advanced army like the South Korean, the Japanese or also the US. However, I think there haven´t yet been a war for a one reason. Could you imagine 40 extra millions of people in South Korea? 40 millions of people who need to be ordered by somebody, like a robot? It must be frustrating to become free in a modern and advanced society to them, in a society with no God State, with no picture of Kim Jong, where no one says to you what you must think and do. But, dare you to observe the economic issue for South Korea?

Imagine 40 millions of people unemployed who raise the unemployment rate in an economic world power. Persons who need to change their mind. There will be a social drama and unsustainable for the main ships and trains exporter in the world. And, of course, there is a lot of benefits at risk in South Korea for most countries. So, I do think US troops haven´t done anything to avoid such hard possible situation.

Thanks for being there. Have a nice day!

Christmas meals in Spain

Weather forecast:  12ºC Max, 6º C Min, no wind and cloudy.

Hi to all again! Today I feel very happy but I don´t know why. I believe it could be possible I am like this way because I don´t stop.

Unfortunately, despite I had had an invitation for a climate change conference and I sent the confirmation, I don´t have a ticket. It is a pity because I was feeling like being present at this conference which is a part of Durban conference but with goals and aims for Spain, here at Madrid. Well, it is usual that someone with better formation or more important than me has a ticket first.

If you like, we will speak about something different. I am not sure whether if you know already or it is also frequent, the fact of having a meal with your work mates or your friends at these times before the classical meals with your family ( 24th December dinner, 25th December and 6th January lunchs). Well, here in Spain, there is such tradition. Hence, employers and employees have a meal to celebrate these times and, of course, there is one similar with friends.

So, it is a opportunity of meeting better your work mates out of job and of speaking about other different subjects. Yeah, it is truth that there is some risk. For instance,  if you were drunk and you talk nonsense with your boss closer, you would begin to wish having any luck after your huge action.

In the other hand, there are such reunions with your fiends. A perfect moment to meet them in this  stressed world. Indeed, I have one with my brother´s friends. Unfortunately, it is in Foxter Hollywood, an usual and expensive restaurant in comparison to others cheaper and more original but it is the group choice.

I quit you because I want to make some exercise. Have a good day!  

Christmas decoration in Spain

Weather forecast: 10ºC Max, 5ºC Min, no wind, cloudy

Hi to all another time!! Currently, we are more and more closer to Christmas time. You can walk on the street and you can see shops´ windows decorated, public lights and, of course, there is such particular smell of roast chestnuts. Moreover, there is such cold in the air, with clouds of breathes. Nearly the majority of trees has lost their leaves and Madroño tree(Arbustus unedo) is in fruit. A particular evergreen tree and before common tree in Madrid Region with their red fruits similar to Chinese Lychee(Litchi chinensis) in shape, that probably you may taste because of some chinese restaurant, but surprisingly in English is called as the strawberries-tree. Anyway,I would note that such tree is Madrid city´s symbol with the company of a she-bear, though there is no bear in these moments and is lower and lower Madroño´s distribution. Whatever...

So, we can speak about another subject. Indeed, I was surprised of Santa´s Parades in North America. Because I have some acquaintances from Canada and they told to me 2 weeks ago that they were in one on Toronto (Canada´s capital). I don´t know if it is often in North America to wait until November to do "Winter Parades" but here, in Spain, we have our Christmas Parades on January. So, why are Santa´s Parades made one month before Christmas in North America? Indeed, I remember one in New York City during thanksgiving day according TV news.

Maybe it is very simple to figure out because it is certain that since November everybody begins to buy gifts, goods and decoration and, as it is more and more often to associate holidays with commercial activity, maybe the reason is to improve commercial balance. I don´t know.

Otherwise, I remember now, while I am typing, that these acquaintances told me that is possibly because of cold because they had a lot of cold on November. Thus, with the Parade on November, they avoid snowy environment and more cold. One thing, I am not very sure because such acquaintances are from Spain and they lived 8 months on Toronto. So, I have the doubt.

Today I have set up the post entry before writing and, okay, you will say: he has forgotten the title. Yeah, I don´t because I would introduce to how Christmas is in Spain.

Friday, I could see "El Belen" in my village centre but what is the Belen? "El Belen" is a sort  of representation of Jesus born. It is a diorama, a scenario with several buildings, some Romans, some figures of such Age, the Three Wise Men and Jesus and their parents. So, according to the tradition, each family begins to decorate their belen. Somebody build it and nearly the huge majority buy it. Anyway, each Belen has different common things such as the Three Wise Men, Jesus´s parents, their animals and the Star (the Star that guided Three Wise Men to Jesus). Maybe you make yourself the following question: and the Child, where is he? Okay, according to the tradition, we place the child in such representation on 24th December when "he borns". For example, in mass of "El gallo" (coquerel) on midnight 24th to 25th December the priest places the child on Belen of the Church. The most curious is  tradition exists from IV century and each person choose how he/she wants to configure their Belen, if they wanted one small, one bigger, with waterfalls, with Romans, with building, which ones figures they will use an so on. Nevertheless, it is more often to watch one in a mall or in a city building (which are the bigger Belen) because modern times make people more lazy and, of course, it is easier to buy a Christmas tree with their decoration, in spite of one home can have a Belen based on Jesus´s parents and Jesus (after 24th) and there is a huge variety of prices.

In the other hand here there wasn´t Santa but Three Wise Men. So, on 6th January there are the gifts because they had left to each children if the children had been good boys (or girls) along the year. However, if they were bad, they have no gifts but a piece of coal. As you can imagine, I guess each children has any gift, despite of economic hole of these moments. I guess I speak about one day before 5th January.

Unfortunately, we lose our traditions because of American fashion. So, we use more and more frequent the Christmas tree and we make gifts on 24th December and don´t on 6th January. It is a pity but times are changing and we must accept without forgetting our past.

Okay, I have finished today, lol. See you later and I hope you have a great week!

P.S.: it is pic of a truth Belen built by http://www.ojodigital.com/foro/off-topic/174135-belen-2007-a.html

The magical dream

Weather forecast: 11ºC Max, 3ºC Min, no wind, sunny with high clouds

Hi another time!! So here I am. I could speak about  shark´s liking in China; Bisphenol A issue at America and at Europe; the scientific fight in Antarctic Region between Russia, UK and USA but sincerely I don t feel like.

So, I will speak like an older person and I will speak about something different, something that is more a feeling or a personal impression than a contrasted new. I guess it is a consequence of being an artistic mind because sometimes I have this weird sensation for the beauty in general patterns.

So, yesterday, I was going to the Centre Library of my previous faculty sited on a green zone and universitary of Madrid´s heart. I was reading in French the book of Fred Vargas "Les vents de Neptune" (Neptune´s wind) and I was imagining this Canadian landscapes in winter with a plenty of lakes, a mass of forest and very cold in the air. I was trying to figure out how it would be the changing leaves at these places, thereby the public transport time died. When I was arrived to the metro station desired I could find this park called Moncloa.

I could pick up a bus (or coach) to arrive to the Centre Library of my faculty but I preferred to through this Moncloa Park, in spite of that means 15 minutes more. However, I have never taken this transport. So, I was walking a little faster to finish the last bureaucracy to have my diploma but I could feel this pure air and, suddenly, I could see a lonely tree without leaves between the conifere side, the ground was covered of a golden cover in a circle area. Time stopped. I couldn´t breath with such a beauty. Between the dark coniferes there was a kind of celestial tree that has born on ground with the cost of losing their leaves like they were wings from an angel. Unfortunately, I wasted several minutes in this position and I had to fix the last university things. So, I went away, keen on thinking about. Sometimes, I realize that I am an odd animal caged and unknown that no one and I can´t understand.

Finally, I had arrived and I fixed everything. They told me that everything had done and now, I must wait the receipt of my diploma that will be sent to my home. At the end, I am closer to have a little paper that show I have finished my degree 5 months ago. You know, Spanish bureaucracy, nothing in comparison with the Canadian.

And I passed to the Library  and I took 3 books in English about my degree to improve a little my vocabulary.

So, I finished there and I could go back to my home. Another time I had to choose the coach or my own feets. Do you know the answer, don´t you? Yes, I decided walking to the metro station.

I could enter in this park, covered by leaves that were drift by wind. They were traces of last rains. Coniferes were silenced like the park itself. I could see pigeons, black birds (Turdus merula) and little parrots (an invasive alien specie) on the green grass. There was no one with 3 persons like exception and then, I went up and down by little hills (It is a curiosity but these hills are a common origin at Local War. Indeed, at XVIII century a lot of people were killed there by Napoleonic soldiers and hundred years later, the stage of Local War, a war were foreign countries tested the weapons of WWII such as the Soviet "moscas" (flies ) and the German "Stuka" (or whatever it is written)).

So, finally this park is a kind of temple for lost souls, with coniferes and autumn trees. It seemed a paint with red, gold, dark and pale green, like colors, thereby you can figure out a little trace of their solemnity. I finished in a little water steam. Two black birds were watching me on the banks, shocked by the deed of seeing a human in that morning. The water sound was like a drug to me. It was magical. I know, I was dreaming in an alive dream. Surprisingly, I saw another time. I saw a golden color more intense than other. I could see the pieces of gold, a shiny sun on the Earth, whereas Sun lights went through out by branches and leaves. A lonely individual. I kept walking and I found 3 students below another golden tree, a tree like the first I had seen but huger and higher;  the trunk had several feets, a mission impossible to around with your arms;  they had leaves yet, in spite of there were ones on the ground. I had a lot of curiosity because this gold color was more intense than other leaves. My scientific mind was working. It wasn´t a Populus genre like other trees. It was odder and strange. I took a leave, while my mind was working and I got it. It was Ginkgo biloba, a fossil alive and Chinese like origin. Indeed, I think I said their name and maybe the 3 students that they were able to identify this tree, looked at me with a surprised face and, at the same time, if they were known the species name.

I guess, sometimes I can be very crazy and I think It is the reason I am lonely. People doesn´t have spirituality. Everything is physical in this life. Maybe I am a romantic lover from XIX century but this is dreaming one more time.

Have a nice beginning of week!

P.S.: I am so sorry that I hadn´t a camera to draw the image but I hope I will draw the dream with my own and poor words.